The Status of Agile and Scrum

Well, the verdict is in and a lot of people are crying if they acknowledge the truth. After more than 20 years, people have found out that Agile and Scrum is bullshit. How many trillions of dollars have been lost on this idiotic concept that goes against every basic principle in life? You have to plan for success. The project management gods don’t just give it to you. You have to do the damn work.

OMG!

I can hear people screaming all over the world now. OMG, not work! I want to do the fun shit! You know the odd thing is, I would ask these Scrum advocates what they would do if the people building their house said “The house will be done when it is done. This is an art form.” and they said that would be unacceptable. So, why in the hell did they think that was a good answer for products in a competitive market? Stupid!

The World Finally Woke Up From the Nightmare!

After all of these years, this was even the song that I heard was being sung at the PMI Global Conference this year. I have never been able to make one and actually heard this from an attendee. Really? That’s the big news? I have been screaming at the trees about this for decades and the world is just now figuring this out after project failure rose to 70% and trillions of dollars were lost? How much could Project Victories have saved you? I even posted about this 8 years ago on this very site!

There’s a Time and Place for Everything

Listen, there are some times when you can fly loose because the project is low-budget and not critical. However, if it is Super Bowl Sunday, you better have your shit wrapped tight and be ready to go. This is the big game. You are not a hobbyist anymore. I have said it more than once, if you are asking an astronaut to put his life on the line, do you think Scrum is the answer?

Scrum Certification

Hell, I even got Scrum certified thinking I was missing something, but it turns out this is the easiest certification in the industry to get. Getting a date for the prom as a geek in high school is harder. Actually, if the geek was a Scrum Master it may really help him. He is certainly experienced enough to get the certification according to the Scrum Alliance.

Conclusion

Hey, I am as guilty as anyone about flying by the seat of my pants sometimes and in that respect Scrum does give you some basic rules if you have a hot team that is tightly wired. However, you have to be experienced enough to know when those times are and in this day and age, most people are not. This is the very purpose of my first book.

You will find very few people with 35 years of experience who were in Austin, TX when this stuff was introduced and are still here today to see its failure, however, there are a few on this site because we are international experts here to serve you. If you are still thinking about Scrum/Agile, don’t. However, if you must because it is your burning desire, then get a pro. Lawyers don’t represent themselves and doctors don’t operate on themselves. Project management is no different. Project managers change the world.

Let’s Git-R-Done this week!